Money...

I got paid today and I just realized that I can't actually afford to live in London.

Happiness

Ok, this day has been very strange - I have been very happy and miserable at the same time.
I was late today from work because I was arguing with my ex on the phone...
Basically... like I have told a bit before... he has all of the stuff I bought with my credit card when I was in USA. He has stuff worth about £2000 and he is basically saying that I can't have any of it.
Not only that he has lots of my personal stuff because the plan always was that I was suppose to go back there, but as things turned out and I learned that I couldn't trust him at all, I decided to stay in UK. He denies my right to any of the stuff he has and just ignores me until I ring him 100 times and force him to answer the phone. And even then he acts like I should beg for him to talk to me.. the only reason I play his game is because I want my stuff but I think I will never get anything from him.
He knows that me and Chris are a couple now and it has made him a bitter bitter little boy. The only thing he can tell me is how stupid I am to be going out with Chris. He calls me a moron and slow because I am such an idiot (well according to him..). He kept telling me how I am making the biggest mistake of my life that I just have to wait and see Chris screw me over again... Aren't those considerate words from a guy who is actually doing the screwing over part himself as we were speaking...
But I didn't let that little episode keep my spirits down for too long, I have accepted the fact that he is very immature and I can't reach him until he deals with his own issues with everything (too bad I am the one that is paying the bill, but I guess that's the price you pay for trusting people too much).
But yes... I got a letter from Chris yesterday and the silly monkey had spelled my name completely wrong.... now what kind of a boyfriend doesn't know how to spell his girlfriends name? lol.
The letter really made my day and I read it probably 10 times before I put it down. I already replied today because I want him to have something to read there, I know his friends probably take their time to write to him, but not me! I will write him as often as I can because I need to vent to someone how I feel about being alone for the whole summer.
It's funny... I am the happiest person alive eventhough my ex is being a bitch and my boyfriend is taken away from me for 6 months, I am alive!

More pics of Finland

I miss Chris :(

Ok, so I haven't been writing for a while.. have had lots of things on my mind.
So Chris, my boyfriend, is in the army detention center for 6 months - the earliest he can get out is on the 1st of October.
I know that this summer will be the hottest ever and every single sunny day I am going curse this world because I won't be able to spend any of those days with the one person I really want to spend them with. He has been gone for a week now and I am litrally going nuts. For a month we were in constant contact with each other and if I didn't hear from him for few hours I started to worry that something was wrong... and now I have no contact to him what so ever.
I have been thinking about him a lot - I lay on my bed and try to think what he is doing at that very moment. At first I was signing on to msn and checking his blog thinking that I might find some news of him there, but of course I never found anything. I freak out sometimes and start to think if it all is too much for me to handle - after all we have been together for only a month.... well month now, we had the whole living together thing last summer that turned out ugly. But the thing is... already year ago I really liked him and thought that we would be really good together because we have all seen what happens if I end up with a traditional nice guy - it just doesn't work out because it's too ordinary, but army detention center... for 6 months... come on... give me a break!
Anyway, as you may imagine I haven't been too happy lately. I feel very bitter about life and often feel like just hiding in my bed and cry because I miss Chris so much. I have made an effort to go out and see people because it can make the time go by faster but at some point I always feel like I just have to leave (especially if I am with couples) because in a way I start to feel really jealous because they don't have people they really care for taken away from them for months and months. Even if they are not together they can call each other and tell them that they miss them and all that jazz. I know it is a very selfish way to think about things but at least I am admitting it - I feel sorry for myself for having to put up with this, it is really breaking my heart and I am sorry about it, ok? But there is nothing I can do about it, I don't like sitting at work with tears in my eyes, feeling anxious because I don't know if my boyfriend is even ok... but that's how the world spins around me at the moment and I just need to take it day by day.
I got a call from him on Saturday though... just a quick call but still it made my day. I almost started crying when I heard him on the phone... that much I had missed hearing from him...
He told me that he was doing fine and that he has been thinking about me a lot... it all felt like from a movie or a TV show... me talking to my man who is locked away... All I needed was a white dress and a wind machine blowing on my hair.
Anyway, it was good to hear that he missed me - that I am not the only one jumping on the walls... and I think he probably though the same.
Well... another thing he told me was that I can go see him on the weekends if I want to (and of course I want to and I will!!). It's a bit of a trek from London, but I will do it as often as I can because I really need to keep seeing him... I can only see him for 2 hours and we are not allowed to touch each other expect when we meet and say good bye, but I will take it - it is so worth it. I can't go see him yet next weekend because he has to have been there for a certain time plus my sister is here anyway.
Well..
That's all from me for now. I think I needed to get that out from my system so I can start writing about boring subjects like work or that strange warp guy who actually sat next to me in the bus this morning (I was secretly keeping an eye on him so he wouldn't kill me or anything...)
But... back to being bored at work now.

Pics of Finland

It's gonna be a lonely summer...

Ok so the verdict is out.... Chris got sentenced 8 months ... which I think is a lot. He apparently won't do more than 6 but still... I was hoping for 6 months and doing 4. Well, I am quite hopeful still though because he is a good guy and gets along with different kinds of people so maybe he will get out a bit sooner for being a nice inmate.
But but but... I am still really sad.
I went for lunch today after hearing the news and realized that I won't even talk to him for a long long time... it made me really sad. I just walked around feeling really empty and out of thoughts. I got a call from him a bit after my lunch... only a quick one, he sounded quite ok, but he is such an actor so I think he might be going through a lot at the moment... poor thing :(
Made me feel really special that he used his one call to call me...
But.... I don't really feel like writing anything at the moment - I will tell you more some other time.

Week ending 25th of April...

Monday bloody monday...
I was 20 minutes late for work today. I was laying on my bed and staring at the TV screen for at least half an hour. I don't really know what they were talking about but TV is like a flame to me, I just stare it and I stop functioning... It doesn't matter which program is on I can stare at anything - "watch" would be actually paying attention, I just stare... I guess it is because I haven't had a TV for a while.
Ok so weekend is over. I left work on Thursday early because Chris had come over to spend the weekend with me. The silly boy had gotten drunk on wednesday evening and somehow ended up in London at 10am on Thursday morning. He apparently missed me so much (aw how sweet) and all he had with him was... uhm... nothing really... I even had to lend him a shirt and clean socks because he had none with him (I offered underwear as well but he wasn't to keen on the idea of wearing girls pants...).
So on Friday I got the devils invention from the post (i.e. TV) - it looks really nice. It's 20" Samsung HD LCD TV. We hooked it up with everything and well end up getting a bit frustrated because the tiny indoor aerial I had didn't really pick up any signals even though it was "made for freeview". Ended up taking it back to Argos on the same day and bought a new one (along with other stuff and a trip to IKEA). Can watch TV now!!!
Well, all in all we had a great weekend that had its ups and downs. I can't wait for everything to be normal and be able to do normal stuff that ordinary couples do (Like go to movies or to a restaurant to have a dinner). I am a bit tired of being the person who pulls the strings on what to do for the simple fact that I am the one who has a bit of money. I know everything will be so much better in the future, I just need to be patient.
But anyway... on Saturday night we went to see stand up comedy in Islington. The show was ok I guess, 2 female comedians... wtf is up with that? They were ok but not mind blowingly funny like some I have seen. After that we stayed there for a few drinks and Chris started talking to this couple that really started to piss me off after about 30 minutes of sitting at the table and being completely ignored. They were mainly talking about army and stuff that I had no idea of. I hardly could hear anyone and as a foreigner (even though my english is pretty good) hearing people is quite essential to being able to be part of a conversation. Usually people have the common courtesy to include everyone to a conversation, especially if someone is very apparently out of it, but this was not the case at all this time. I concentrated on drinking my vodka orange juice and getting annoyed. I actually didn't think of it until Chris mentioned it, but the stupid whore (excuse my french) was hitting on Chris right under my eyes and her boyfriend's as well. I noticed at one point that she had pulled her hair down all sexy like - I naturally thought it was for her boyfriend. But now that I think about it, she did come sit very close to Chris and just talked to him like there was no one else in the bar. Apparently she had put her hand on Chris' knee as well... lucky for her I didn't see it because no one messes with my man! At one point I got enough of it and said that it was time for us to go - we had a bit of an episode on our way to the tube stop but all was well in the end. We ended up going to a local pub in Stratford which really made my heart melt. There was a Karaoke night and no one looked like the posh people we saw in the center earlier. I loved it and I will definately be going back there sometime.
Sunday came and Chris had to leave back to the earthy colours of the British military. After buying the emergency morning after pills ( ;x lol) from the Boots (expensive shit btw... might want to keep using the alternative method...) we said goodbyes at Stratford station. I hate goodbyes so much because I would cry even if I was saying bye to a person I don't even care about (let alone someone I do really care about!). Well, I have become pretty good with that though... it's like... when guys think of ham sandwiches during sex ( :P ) I think of something similar when saying goodbyes so I don't cry.
Oh why we said goodbye? Well, Chris will be gone for a looooong time (at least in my standards) and I won't be even able to call him in the evening to say good night.
Anyway, I need to go find a bank now (lol, I am at Canary Wharf in London that basically has nothing but banks....) I shall write something more maybe tomorrow.
*hugs*

The trueth is out there

Something very strange happened to me today - I saw a man disappear infront of me to thin air... I know that sounds like from some lame sci-fi movie but I am not kidding!! I was coming to work with a bus today and when I was getting off a guy in his early 20s basically pushed me out of the way and started to run away from the bus stop and 2 seconds later he had disappeared. I was looking at him because I couldn't get my head around where he was running to because there were no other bus or train stops anywhere near. After he disappeared I stayed a while just trying to see where he had gone but there was no doors, or hallways he could have gone, plus he would have had to move faster than light to do so because I was looking at him all this time. I'm telling you, I saw him disappear infront of my eyes and I am still really puzzled by it...
So if you don't hear from me for a while I have been killed by some weird future timewarp people who doesn't want people to know about them... lol.
Anyway, just wanted to share that here because I think I am going crazy...

Please give me some work to do....

So I have been watching Desperate Housewifes the majority of the time at work today... Not much to do at all.. Time is going by soooo slow.
When time goes by this slow I start to get very unproductive as well. When a job comes in I feel like not doing it anymore - I am stuck in my boredom. I don't feel like writing, I don't feel like surfing on the net... I just want to let my brains sleep.
I went to work 2.5 hours late this morning but it was my own choice. I felt ill last night after I had some white wine and I am really starting to think that I am not supposed to drink that stuff anymore - it always seem to give me a headache and make me feel ill now, I used to quite like it before... But anyway, I woke up this morning and felt like I had the weight of the world poured on me during the night. My head hurted and my stomache was in knots. So I sent a message to my boss that I was going to be a little late. I made me some breakfast and had a cup of tea and voila, I was feeling a lot better. It was really sunny outside so I washed my sheets and left them drying out in our garden for the day - hopefully it won't rain before I get home. But yeah - I liked having a long morning... It makes days a lot better, but no way I will wake up every morning at 5 just to have a long relaxing morning.. forget that- I like sleeping more than long mornings... well.... that is if I am alone... in a company it's different story... hmm... *daydreaming*.....
Anyways... I am going to skip home soon - oh one more thing.. I found 2 girls today from the IT team (w00t) and we are going to have lunch tomorrow - how exciting!! I am not the only one here!!!

doghnuts!

Ew, I ate 2 doghnuts today!!!!
My work mate Georgi has a birthday today so he brough a HUGE box of Krispy Creme Doghnuts to the office... ewwwwwwww, bad idea... I can't resist the power of doghnuts!!!!! Now I feel bloated and yack! But oh how good those doghnuts were...... mmm... doghnuts....

Random Ramblings

Oh man... I feel like I have been spending so much money lately.
I bought me that TV finally... I'm having it delievered on Friday. I paid my sisters flights here, I bought me travel card yesterday and went shopping in IKEA... Well, the thing is... I haven't really spent that much... my sister will pay me back the flight when she gets here and I only spend £20 in IKEA yesterday (I know, how weird is that!!). TV was quite expensive (£200) but the thing is.... I have money on my account but the past set backs have really made me scared of spending money. I never want to be in that situation again when I don't have money to buy food or not know where I am going to spend the folowing night. I think I was traumatised a bit to be honest... I have started to feel quilty of every single penny I spend even though I have enough money to go crazy with shopping.. well I guess there's nothing wrong with feeling frugal (yes, I learned that word today!! lol) but it's not like me at all!
Anyways... I can't wait on Thursday!!! My babyyyyy is coming to spend the weekend with me and then I won't see him for God knows how long :( I am a bit sad of the fact that he will be gone for months(how long? I don't know yet..) but I am trying not to think like that - when he comes back it will be the best feeling ever!
It's really strange how I am starting to be absolutely crazy about him lol - maybe it's a good idea that he goes away for a while so I can cool down haha.
But yeah, he is coming to London for a long weekend (and hopefully sort out my new TV for me hehe) - we are going to have some fun, I always enjoy hanging out with him, we have been having insanely long conversations on the phone (for me that's something else because I don't usually talk on the phone that much) and I just feel really natural about everything we do and talk about. I know, i know... you are thinking that "isn't that how it is supposed to be?" but look at the colour of this website!!!! It's PINK! so screw you and let me be happy :)
So I have only 4 days of work this week YAY! then next week is normal (ish) week and then week after that MY SISTER IS COMING HERE!!! I am so excited about that, we will have so much fun!
I have to start doing stuff on weekends though - I dunno what though... I had no plans last weekend, was just sitting home bored... It was KILLING ME! I did clean up my room, cooked, did laundry, went shopping, watched random shows on my laptop, played ffxi and just chilled out but oh my god was it boring!? YES it was!! and I never want to do that again... If I have no plans for the weekend I will go annoy my coupled friends or something even if they don't want me to :P
But...I think I will go hunt some food from the restaurant now. This is the last day I am eating stuff from the restaurant for a while. I need to start cutting down my spending on stuff here... I can easily spend £7 a day on food in the restaurants here. It's not that much considering it is very good quality food... I will at least stop having breakfast here because I always end up having sausages and other unhealthy stuff... and they don't have rye bread there either. But yeah - from now on I will start to watch a bit what I put in my mouth, my eating habits have gone worse since I started working here and I don't want to gain any weight!
Anyway... I am off to get some food *tummy rumbles* - see you laterrrrrrrr!

Weekend plans = 0

I have been so busy today!!!! :)
Well, I quite like being busy because it makes the day go by really fast and it's friday yay!
Well, I don't really have much planned for this weekend. I will go home tonight, probably surf on the net, watch random shows from my laptop and maybe play a bit of ffxi ... go to sleep early and wake up on saturday morning and CLEAN UP MY ROOM!!! At the moment it looks if that Tiny Toons character that spins around a lot have been through my room... a complete chaos!!! I was looking forward to spending time with my new boyfriend again this weekend (!! :) ) but he is stuck at army for the weekend which makes Tan a very frustrated little girl... (in more ways than one.. !).
Well... I think I won't have time to write much more today because it's actually time to GO HOME in a minute!!! I might go buy that TV tomorrow if I get really bored... don't know yet.. it all debends on so many things. GOTTA REMEMBER TO BOOK MY SIS' TICKETS FOR HER TO FLY HERE!!!!!! lol random rambling... My sister is coming here soon but I will tell you more about it a bit later.
Now I go stuff myself into a packed underground, yay! Cya later people!

<3

Dreams

I had a dream last night that I was running late for my flight. I was running at the airport and stressing out because I felt that I was not going to make it. I went to the check in and there was a flight that I could go to even though the one I was supposed to have taken had gone long time before. It was very strange...
Strange because I seem to have these exact same dreams from time to time. Usually I just miss the plane and that's it.. Now I missed the plane and was sent on another plane. I wasn't even sure if the plane was going to where I wanted to go.
I know there could be some very obvious explanations to these dreams... especially because I usually have these dreams when I have met someone I am interested in...
So I keep missing a plane (sometimes it has been a boat) and I keep running around at the airport in a hurry until I wake up. Some interpretations say that it's my subconcious telling me that I feel like I am missing something in my life, opportunities or something else. So... does it mean that when I meet someone I feel that I will fail the relationship? or does it mean that I am afraid that if I go into a relationship I will miss out on some opportunities I might have gotten if I was single? And now there is another aspect of me actually getting on the plane and not knowing where I was going...
Airplane in a dream apparently represents freedom - freeing yourself from the every day troubles or things that haunt you - so I guess I have to think that it is a positive thing...
My dreams always go hand in hand with the things that go in my life... Like for example a little while ago I had a dream that I was in a restaurant and suddenly all my clothes disappeared. It was horrible but the reason for that dream was very obvious. That same week someone had found out things about me that I didn't want anyone to know about and naturally I felt exposed (naked).
Dreams intrigue me - they explain so many things about ourselves if you know how to look at them. I sometimes have very vivid dreams that makes me wonder the world for days and days afterwards.

Work!

So today has been quite busy... Have been very productive though and in high spirits - hope all days could be like today.
I work for a IT team in a big bank in London and I have to say that I probably have never had this laid back job - I don't see me ever stressing about my job as long as I work here. There are lots of things that I am in charge of but as long as I do my work I am fine - I create my own deadlines here (as long as they are reasonable) and I even approve or disapprove my own holidays (good thing about being the only admin in the team). Not only that, my work mates are awesome. I sit next to my boss and believe it or not, I don't mind it at all. I was asked if I want to change desks to a more private area and I said no because I like being able to chat away with the guys I work with. I am the only woman in this whole team of 60+ people... felt a bit strange at first and still sometimes I miss the company of another female but guys that I work with have welcomed me in their team with open arms. Everyone seems to be a real character and there are no stupid hypothetical rules here that makes everything awkward. I never really wrote about the work I did before my episode in US... it was a company called Candywall and I have to say that I have never ever in my whole life worked for such fake people as some of the people there. But what can you expect it's a company that provides phone and internet porn, run by an italian gay guy who has a 20 something lapdog taking care of all his errands. We were spyed with CCTV all the time incase we weren't working all of the time we were at our desks, our personal emails were read and when I made an issue about it the response was a cheesy email saying "you wouldn't want anyone sending any viruses or some private information out of the office?" .... So I guess that gives them a permission to read all the emails and then talk about the content like it was nothing. We were shouted at for listening to radio and whistling in the office was a big no no. Phones weren't allowed to be on in the office and if you got a call you had to go hide somewhere so the big boss doesn't see you not working. I was actually told off for talking for 2 minutes on the phone once and it was when I had actually done all the stuff I was supposed to have done... I made a big fuzz about it actually, because I think it was really unfair. AND not only all that but there was a hierarchy in the office that no one was really allowed to talk about. Now that I think about it it really makes me sick. The office was divided in 2; Operations team that dealt with everyday stuff that kept the company working sat on one side - the side that had no windows and a direct view to the gay guys office where he could keep an eye on us if his cctv link was down. On the bright side of the office with more privacy sat the marketing team that was always brilliant and always working very hard (according to our fine manager...) ... Well, I guess it's hard to really give a good idea of what it was there, let's just say I am very happy to be out from there and I really appreciate anything that is better than Candywall!!!!!
So yeah, there we go - todays post was about bashing my old workplace! ... I still haven't decided about the TV... I kinda want one but can I afford it?

Should I buy a TV

I have been so unproductive lately... Been thinking about lots of things but not writing any of it down. I hate it when you really like someone your mind gets clouded and you really have to consentrate to get other thoughts filtered through.. lol, it's silly and I think only girls go through that process...
Well anyway... let me try to tell you about stuff that I have been doing lately.
I have been thinking about buying me a TV... yes... me... buying a TV! Sounds a bit weird since I never watch TV but I remember when I had a TV I used to always turn it on in the morning to wake me up and I really liked it, because it made the whole waking up process a lot easier. And not just that... I quite like occasionally just turning off my brain and watching some TV show.. I do that now but I download the shows to my laptop. TV's are pretty cheap nowadays... but I have been spending too much lately!!! I found this awesome website where I can order cosmetics from US for a LOT cheaper than what they cost in UK or anywhere in EU... but the problem with sites like that is that once you find them you start going crazy and end up spending a lot more money than you would if you had just bought that one thing that you needed from a shop over here. Well... I don't feel too bad about it though because I bought me lots of nice things that will make me commercially happy lol.
I like spending money (what kind of a girl doesnt like spending money??) but when I spend a lot I start feeling really quilty about it - the thing is... with the money I just spent on fancy stuff I could have flown to New York and back on a good offer. BUT... no point thinking like that right? I have time to experience all that a bit later.

FREE TIBET (and erase China!!)

All right! Monday and I am at work... My day started with a meeting with my employer where my pay was, funnily enough, increased by £1400 a year... which naturally always is a nice thing. My pay will also be reviewed once my probation period is over... which is in 4 weeks.

I had a really nice weekend...

I went to Cardiff on Friday to spend some quality time with my boyfriend. (It still feels so weird to call him my boyfriend though... gotta get used to it!!!) Time flew by - as it always does when you are enjoying yourself - and I didn't want to really leave yesterday, but not much I could have done about it... I'm really itching to write about him here, but I think that stuff will stay in my private diary for now - I am just really happy how things have turned out between me and him - We used to be our worst enemies just few months ago and now he seems to be the only thing I can think about... But that's enough about him.

The Olympic Torch was in London yesterday. GO GO Protestants!!! I am so proud of these people. I am laughing this morning when I was reading about someone trying to snatch the torch or someone trying to put the flame out with a exstiguisher... too bad they didn't succeed. Olympic games in such a corrupt country as China is a stupid stupid idea ... I think the only good thing coming out from the games is that people will finally pay attention to that poor excuse of a country. I was watching news clips on youtube and some of the comments there made me laugh at how ignorant some people can be. Lots of people were saying that the protests againts olympic games are so wrong because politics and sport shouldn't be mixed... If I remember correctly from the history lessons Olympic Games were outlawed as a pagan festival for a long time and also the modern version of Olympic Games is all about politics - otherwise you wouldn't need to be filthy rich to host the games. I just have this feeling that the protests that have happened so far are only a top of the iceberg that these games will cause. Bad bad stuff will happen if/when these games start and I don't really want to say "I told you so" then... They should just cancel the olympics for this year (1st time for everything, right?) and tell China to sort out their human/animal rights and then come asking for a re-run.

But anyway... I think that's about it for now, I might write something more a bit later if I get bored.

I'm so tired but happy :)

So yeah, won't write much - just thouhgt to put this pic up here, which was taken last night. It's me and my boyfriend who is making me very happy.

Hitching a ride!

Ok, so it's the day that we all live for again - FRIDAY! I am not quite sure what will happen with my weekend - but hopefully it is something exciting.

The weather has been quite nice for the past days... not warm as in "run around in your T-shirt" warm, but warm enough for me to change my coat to my spring coat and not feel cold when sitting outside in a cafe having lunch. There is quite big leaves in the trees already which always makes me dazzled because in Finland when there are leaves in the trees, it means summer will be there in few weeks... I don't really understand the seasons in UK anyway... there is basically only rainy season and nice and sunny season - and these two season can happen in one day.

So today has been my lazy day. I haven't really done anything at work today... well besides some small tasks that has to be done every day to keep the business running. I probably had like 2h lunch break because I wasn't paying attention to the time but no one seems to mind - they are doing the same.

Someone was talking to me about hitchhiking today and it made me think about the occasions when I have hitchhiked in my life...

When I was younger (and I mean like 15) I didn't seem to mind hitchhiking at all. We used to live in the middle of nowhere so if I wanted to get somewhere without asking permission from my parents I would have to hitchhike.

I remember one time me, my mother and my sister we were going to spend a day in the town and we were cycling there (town was about 18 km [just over 10 miles] away from where we lived) and my mother had a flat tyre on her bike... SO, my mother took my bike and she told me to hitchhike... lol, I still find it so funny, but that's how used to hitchhiking I was when I was a kid. Then I got a bit older and didn't hitchike for a while, only when I was hanging out with this one crazy traveller friend of mine I did some more hitchiking. We hitchiked in Finland and also one time we hitched a ride from Lappeenranta, Finland to St. Petersburgh, Russia - it was a fun trip especially because the person who picked us up was russian and didn't speak any english nor finnish and naturally neither of us spoke any russian...

It's a shame that nowadays people are so scared of other people (and for a reason many times as well) that hitchhiking is not so common any more. I remember when I was a kid there were always people somewhere trying to get a ride somewhere and now you can maybe spot one person in the whole summer to be waving a sign next to a road. WE NEED MORE HITCHHIKERS!!! Not only does it save you money but you meet great people while doing it. Many times the person who picks you up is a person who used to live in the age of hitchhiking and they did it themselves when they were young... or sometimes it might be a sleazy but harmless truck driver who really appreciates the company - NEVER have i gotten harrassed while getting a ride from a stranger - of course some kind of caution is in place but I would say that 90% of all the people driving on the roads are normal people just like you and me... When you get a ride - text the license number of the car to a friend and tell them where you were picked up and where you were going, and if they haven't gotten another message back from you in the next 30 mins they will call to find out if everything is ok - or call the police if something is wrong. You can ask for the drivers name, it's not rude ... and as a gesture of good will you can show the driver your ID so they know who you are - common sense is always handy to have - and above all HITCHIKING IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUN!!! so smile when you are trying to get a ride and you might get a ride a lot easier (and a sign saying where you are going doesnt hurt either).

I think I haven't done enough hitchhiking lately... maybe this summer i make a little road trip to somewhere in Europe and hitchhike the whole way, stay at local people from couchsurfing (check it out btw!!) and really bring back the budget traveling memories... The fact is... you can travel around the world for free if you have the will to do it - most of us doesnt though - anyone want to join me?

Tan @ work

This is Tan busy at work... Taking pics with her camera phone... I think my next mission is to take pics of other people... hihiiiiii *evil grin*

Europe

Today's been one of those days when I feel like I have lots to do but can't be asked to do any of it even though it would make me feel more organized. I have been learning stuff about Blackberries (you know those phone/computer thingies that all "important" people have) since I might be asked to help provide support and install them to people in this building, I have been taking minutes in a meeting with senior project managers and producing various spreadsheets. I still have charts to make for our monthly reports and updating some formulas to our billing and profit&loss spreadsheets but I am trying to ignore them as much as I can. I also have to compile all of the company's timesheets for last week and breakdown everyone's hours to normal pay, overtime, holiday, sickpay and generate a spreadsheet that I have to send out to the managers... and... I need to create new emailgroups and aaaargh... I actually have lots to do and yet here I am writing my blog lol. Well, don't worry be happy is my motto - I have all these things that I need to do but I make my own deadlines - NO STRESS!!! :)
Ok, so I work in an environment that is the opposite of what I actually am - I don't like how everyone looks the same everywhere wearing suits and similar haircuts - where is the individuality!!!??? People sit at their desks the whole day - staring at some screen and making sure the wheels of the world keep turning... yack, it makes me sick to think about it... I so want to get out from here, I want to work in my own cafe making soups for suit people and remind them that there is a better world out there.
Another funny thing that happened today... We were having a look at the map of Europe today and I was shocked how badly EVERYONE (except me) knew where all the countries were. People were able to name UK, France, Spain, Italy, Germany, Sweden and Finland (probably because I have talked about them) and that's about it. One of the guys was positive that Denmark is where Estonia is and no one had ANY clue of the Eastern European countries... well, I guess that is somehow understandable because for the Western Europeans these countries were known as Russia for a long time, but come on, move on with the time. However I didn't find any explanation of not knowing where Holland and Belgium were... Only one I didnt know was Moldova and now I know that as well :)
Can you place the countries on the European map? You should... I bet you that an average 10 year old can.

is it obvious?

The post about things that makes me happy was inspired by a mini argument I had the other day with someone and it made me think that it's really impossible to know what makes someone happy and the other person might not think anything of it unless you talk about stuff like that.
It's silly that I am already a grown woman and I realize stuff like that which should be obvious for a 10 year old. How can someone make me happy of they don't know anything about me really?
Well, I think it has been obvious for me before but has the years made me cold and bitter? I don't know - will have to wait and see ;)

10 Things that make me happy (and sad)

1. Wasting time by walking in random places, looking at people/world and breathing the life in. - Being in a hurry
2. Enjoying sunrise, sunset, sunshine - Everything about the sun. - Being inside on a sunny day is a sin
3. Cooking & serving the food I cook to others (+eat and enjoy different foods with someone, in and out) - People not liking the stuff I make or ignoring my efforts
4. Helping people in need - ungrateful and proud people
5. Spending time with friends and family (especially a few good ones in Finland + mum and sis) - Arguing with friends or family
6. Shopping with a person who likes shopping even if nothing is bought - forced shopping
7. Being lazy when it's gray and rainy outside and properly spoil myself with bubblebaths, cuddling and junk food. - Having to be outside when it's gray and rainy
8. Playing games (board & computer) - Playing too much games
9. Getting drunk in good company without stress of going out - forced drinking and deadlines
10. People noticing my efforts of making the world a better place one step at a time - ignorant people!

April- fools!!!!

No one has fooled me today and they only have a bit over an hour time to do it or they become april fools apparently, I didn't know about that actually...

I am majorly bored at the moment (what else is new) - I only have a little bit of work to do and I feel that I am just wasting time here (@ work that is). I shouldn't complain because it is easy work but I'm getting frustrated.

(Above me being interested...:P )

I have been thinking about starting to do something in the evenings because I feel a bit stuck in my routines at the moment and I have never been very good at routines. The pattern is that after I get bored I start planning and I go over board with everything - move to another country or something, at least quit my job and go traveling for months and months... but I don't really want to do that, I want to achieve something and not feel the need to always change (I can feel it all happening though... *sigh*).... So... therefore I have been thinking that if I just spiced up my life a bit I might be less eager to change it trastically, but I don't know where to start.

A friend of mine asked me to start taking dance courses with her and I thought it was a brilliant idea - not just to dance but to hang out with her because we don't get to see eachother enough in my opinion - but she has been way too busy to go forward with the proposal... *sulk*

I also wanted to start learning spanish... but the courses were £200+ and at the time when they started I had no money (not like I am swimming in money now either though..) and for some reason there are no prober courses starting until summer/autumn. Well.... I will look for something else, I just really want my life to contain more things that I am interested in.